Things my Two-Year-Old Taught Me: XXIII

 Secretly hiding in the corner is much more effective than sitting on the potty.

Green m&m’s taste better than any other color.

What the imaginary monster wants wins out over what mommy wants any day.

If you’re sassy and about to be put in the corner, all you have to say is “Just kidding!” and you can totally get out of it.

The only thing a little sister is good for is trying to pawn your veggies off on.

Dogs are the coolest animal on earth, from a distance.

If mom says no, ask dad.  If dad says no, ask grandma.            

Who needs an entire CD?  The best way to sleep at night is listening to the same song over and over and over again ALL NIGHT LONG.

The only thing cooler than a fire engine is a train.  The only thing cooler than a train is a school bus.  The only thing cooler than a school bus is a garbage truck.  The only thing cooler than a garbage truck is a plane.  The only thing cooler than a plane is... wait.  There’s NOTHING cooler than a plane.

Two yr olds don’t “need” naps.  Which is why you find them fast asleep on top of their toys instead of in their beds.

If you take a toy I’m playing with, it’s naughty, but if I take a toy YOU’RE playing with, it’s “sharing.”

The only safe place during a storm is next to Mom.